GANGSTA GRANDMA

Brittany and I were cellmates for 10 days. She was 18 and I was 54. We played a lot of cards and she kept me laughing with her antics and kept me abreast of the gossip in the unit. She named me Gangsta Grandma and urged me to write the rhyme. We performed it in the rec. yard together in front of the women in Bravo to a standing ovation I might add!

You have to imagine the rap beat and Ice, Ice Baby by Vanilla Ice. ICE is
U.S. Immigration and Customs Enforcement for the uninitiated.

GANGSTA GRANDMA

I'm a gangsta grandma and this is my rhyme
I 'bin in the 'po 'po house a long, long time
When I tried to bond out they weren't so nice
They said, "You got a hold and it comes from
ICE, ICE baby

Chorus: Gangsta Grandma, Gangsta Grandma (performed by Brit twirling her waist-length hair)
ICE, ICE baby
Gangsta Grandma, Gangsta Grandma

Depoo's playing cards
Jay's playing hoes
Cheryl walks around saying "Shut the French doors"
Tiffany trades all the chow that she can
Sara says to S.A. drain the cooler man, I need some
ICE, ICE baby

Gangsta Grandma, Gangsta Grandma
ICE, ICE baby
Gangsta Grandma, Gangsta Grandma

Jo-Jo sees the light and Tamala's detained
Hamilton and Swisher are at it once again
Baby Mama gets bigger and the girls are flappin'
Chip reads the cards and tells us what will happen
In paradise, ICE baby

Gangsta Grandma, Gangsta Grandma
ICE, ICE baby
Gangsta Grandma, Gangsta Grandma

United States,
United States,
Estados Unidos...
Awwww fuck it.